When we talk about wellness, money may not be the first thing that comes to mind. We think about exercise, nutrition, stress, sleep and emotional health. But the more I work with people as a financial advisor—and the more I think about my own background in psychology and wellness—the more I believe our relationship with money belongs in that conversation, too.
Because money isn’t just math. Money can represent security. Freedom. Success. Generosity. Fear. Independence. Control. Even love.
I recently heard someone connect financial behaviors to the five love languages, and it made me think about how differently two people can experience the exact same financial decision.
Imagine someone who loves giving gifts. Spending $200 on the perfect birthday gift might feel incredibly meaningful to her. Her spouse might look at the same purchase and think, ‘We spent $200 on what?’
Or maybe quality time is what matters most to you. You wouldn’t dream of spending thousands on a designer handbag, but a family vacation? Absolutely.
Neither person is necessarily wrong. They’re attaching different meaning to their money.
But Do You Understand Your Own Financial Life?
But Do You Understand Your Own Financial Life?There’s another side of financial wellness that I think is particularly important for women.
In many relationships, one person naturally takes the lead with the finances – and that might be associated with their love language or personality. Maybe your husband loves investments, pays the bills, and schedules the meetings with the financial advisor. There’s nothing wrong with that.
But there’s a difference between saying, “He handles our investments,” and saying, “I have absolutely no idea what we have or what I would do without him.”
Women today are building careers, running businesses, raising families, caring for aging parents, managing households and making major financial decisions. Some are married. Some are single. Some will experience divorce or the loss of a spouse. Our lives don’t all look the same.
And financial confidence doesn’t mean you have to become an investment expert. Ask yourself: Do you know where your major accounts are held? Do you understand, generally, what you own? Do you know what comes into your household and what goes out? Do you know who to call with questions? And when you sit in a meeting with a financial professional, do you feel comfortable participating in the conversation?
More importantly, if something happens to your partner who handles the finances, you’re prepared.
Money Is Personal
Money Is PersonalOne of the things I love about financial planning is that the numbers are only part of the story. Our financial behaviors can be shaped by how we grew up, what makes us feel safe, what we’re afraid of losing, what success means to us and even how we express love. Have that conversation with your spouse or partner.
That’s why financial wellness isn’t necessarily about having more money. It’s about having clarity.
It’s being able to say, I understand my financial life. I have a voice in the decisions that affect me. I may not know everything, but I’m comfortable asking questions.
Maybe your spouse will always be the one who loves spreadsheets, investments and paying the bills. Let them! But understanding your financial life isn’t about taking over – be an active participant in your own future.
And to me, that’s wellness, too.
October 2026
