I love following finance and economics expert Mohamed El-Erian on LinkedIn, and I always try to catch his appearances on Bloomberg.
He recently reshared a post he wrote after his 10-year-old daughter listed 22 moments he had missed during that school year—from her first day of classes to her inaugural soccer match. She got her yearbook, pointed to a specific photo, and simply said, “Even when you are here, you are not here.” It was a photo of his daughter dressed as Annie for a school play and El-Erian is seated behind her, deeply involved in his mobile phone.
I don’t have children, but still this post spoke to me.
I started over at 47 in a new career and although being a financial advisor has been the most professionally meaningful and life-changing thing I’ve done in my life to date, it has absolutely been the most challenging and difficult. The amount of effort that goes into earning clients’ business while gaining industry knowledge is something that was impossible for me to measure as I decided to enter this career field.
I’ve had tense moments with friends after I’ve realized that I haven’t been a great friend when I needed to be. I have treated get-togethers with them as opportunities to gain new business. If I couldn’t work in a meeting with a prospective client while I was at it, I was likely to cancel my visit with my friend.
I’ve noticed how many times my husband and I have been on our property- the link to the place that is meant to be our time to be in nature and unplug from the rat race- and I’ve made that phone call, responded to that text or replied to that email. All of them work-related.
There is a slippery slope between working hard to make it in your career, and balancing work and life.
Sometimes I get it right. A lot of times, I don’t.
El-Erian credits that conversation with his daughter a dozen years ago with becoming a turning point in his life, making him realize how absent he had been.
It was a great reminder for me that boundaries are necessary and healthy. It helped me release a bit of guilt I’ve had over my recent response to a prospective client’s question. After I told him my fee he asked, “So does that get me 24/7 access to you…nights, weekends, holidays?”
“No,” I said.
I believe he mostly was kidding.
But I felt it was important to answer the question seriously because one of my goals for 2025 is to balance my work and personal life a bit better. I hope you’ll do the same if needed. Here’s hoping we all get it more right than wrong in 2025.
February 2025
